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July 22, 2005

Now that we've seen Hot Coffee...

We can safely say you are all idiots.

1 - Those who are out there buying the product - you're idiots because the graphics in this are so piss poor that you'd be better off spending your $40 on 4 bad adult DVDs.

2 - Those who are protesting the product, going after Rockstar, you're a bunch of morons because you're helping promote the product you supposedly want to kill off, and your argument is laughable, see #1 above.

3 - Those who aren't paying attention are missing another one of those parochial invasions of personal privacy and choice. Even if you have no interest either way, you should be doing everything in your power to dethrone the neopuritan fascists. Yes, that includes reading about it.

4 - The whole thing is ridiculous, another grand-standing power grab for the politicians, religious "leaders", and rabid soccer moms everywhere who can't control their kids and need government to stop businesses who are providing the base temptation and distractions. It's a reaction beyond reason.

Let's prove that last bit.  Go out and buy a copy of Vogue.  Cut out the models pictures and rearrange them coupled in suggestive groupings.  Now move them back and forth and moan.  The only difference here is that Hot Coffee/San Andreas is on a computer.  Oh, that and the fact that paper bits are so much higher resolution and basically better looking - basically more sexually evocative!  So why aren't the numb-nuts going after Vogue?

  Don't get us wrong here. We think GTA-SA sucks ass as a gaming experience.  We just can't get behind a bunch of pasty-faced white computer and video game players dropping into the Virtual Gangsta Lifestyle.  What a bunch of self-hating losers.  

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