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March 27, 2005
Bush Weekend Update #2
Darn it. W and Buddies got some bad news Friday. After topping out at 60% approval rating when Saddam "Spider's Nest" Hussein was captured, said rating has gone nowhere but down since. His subsequent involvement in the war that continues to bleed away our children's future, making up a Social Security disaster, and finally rallying around the "shove that feedin' tube back in there bubba" movement has dropped him down to 46% approval. That's less than half for those not so mathematically inclined - the majority of folks disapprove of him. And there's probably momentum in that dive given oil prices and the lack of a Condi to lead us in the future.
Mr. Bush, we here with the People's Mandate Committee. We're afraid we have to repossess the mandate you took a few months ago for non-payment of expectations...
Funny as that might be, we do have some ideas on a Three Step Program that could put George right back on top of the whole approval rating rollercoaster:
End the war. That doesn't
mean pull out uniformly now, or even set a real
date. It does mean formulating,
publishing, and sticking to a real "exit
strategy" and assuring the US taxpayers that
they're not just going to be writing off an
additional 10% of their take-home pay to fund
Halliburton's wretched excesses for the rest of
Stop trying to merge Your
Church and Our State. Again, you
illiterate goon, you need to focus on the
business of government and stop trying to jam
the morality of some inbred fools down the
throats of thinking people. It ain't working,
ain't gonna work, and you're just wasting
everyone's time and energy not doing your job.
Admit to your mistakes. Admit to your administration's "truth manipulation." Admit to adjusting our government's positions to feed the coiffeurs of your gluttonous mammon-worshiping friends. Knock it the fuck off! Ask forgiveness and move on. Come to Jesus, he'll forgive you.
Yeah, it's a modest proposal, and we could even be satisfied without #3, but even speaking simple truth and a focus on the job it is too radical to suggest. This reich isn't that flexible or progressive in their thinking. We're expecting 3.75 more years of moronic tail chasing, talk radio justice, and ignorance breeding ignorance.
Today's Bible Lesson:
Read the Lies
Read the Shouts
Read the Archives
Read the Static
Read the Financials
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