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July 2, 2004
July Road Trip
We're going to be a little irregular for the next couple of days. We're on the road again. Some quick thoughts:
Oregon cops obviously don't understand that the natives are the problem.
Sure miss real radio. We're pretty sure country and western is itself as big a cause of mental retardation as inbreeding.
In-and-Out Burger is worth the wait.
Transparent skirts and thongs do not belong on the same body as bifocal lenses.
As you approach a WallMart... wait a sec... get the hell away from that WallMart!
Droolingly patriotic bumper stickers usually mean there's a urban terrorist behind the wheel.
Skeeter, it don't matter how much crap you wear - you ain't urban. You're still a mud sucking hillbilly who doesn't even know what that FUBU logo means.
And Skanky, the zircon bling don't make you miss thing, you funky butt, and simple slut. Get back to momma's and help clip them coupons.
Broadband everywhere our ass. There are too many areas of the country where the damn phone lines don't support a connection above 19k.
Did we mention the whole thing about Oregon navies? Oh yeah, guess we did. There's a reason they're nicknamed "Goners". Apparently they resent the Californians and Washingtonians moving in, buying up the good properties, and basically making them into the servant class. Get with the program Jethro! Servant class is a step up for your sorry ass!
Much love - The Misters E
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