www.evil.com

we get it

October 13, 2003

And while we're on the subject of cyborg monkeys...

Our friends at PETA have to be beside themselves with yet another experimental animal story, but we find the sliver lining in the story of a neural implant that allows a monkey to function with a mechanical third arm.

The test: use the robot arm to grab a joystick and move a cursor on the computer screen. Apparently they were able to "reach and grasp with the same precision as their own hand!"

Dear Lord! Do you know what this portends? An army of cyber-monkeys all trained to play three videogames at once! No longer wasting time choosing between XBOX, Playstation and Nintendo! It's every evil genius' dream!

     

Read the Lies

Read the Shouts

Read the Archives

Read the Static

Read the Financials

evil.com is back.  we get it.  check back daily.